Merry Christmas

I want to wish everyone a wonderful holiday! Eat, drink and be merry!

Only seven more days until our five year wedding anniversary and the end of this horrible year. I can't remember a time when I was looking so forward to the new year coming around. Come on 2009...hurry up and get here! Hurry, hurry, hurry!!!

Ten million things to do....gotta run!
Cheryl

Great Week

I am having a great week! Eddy and I had a heart to heart earlier in the week and I feel so much better knowing where he is coming from and how he feels.

This week I was busy with a lot of appointments. The lymphedema therapist (Jeanette), the radiation oncologist (Dr Kim), the chiropractor (Dr Marie Royer) and the lymphedema massage therapist (Sonja Morgner).

Jeanette was able to get the insurance to cover a pump and jacket that will help the lymph fluid move in my body. The pump "decongests" your trunk first then moves on to your hand and arms. At each of my visits with Jeanette we use the jacket and pump she has, now I will be able to decongest myself daily! I'll post a picture when the equipment arrives so everyone will get an idea of what it looks like.

I'll post more later!
Cheryl

Bone Scan.....

CLEAR!!!! Yippy. I met with the oncologist the other day for a follow up and for my Tamoxifen prescription. During the appointment I asked the fifty million questions I had and mentioned the hip pain. After a brief discussion and an exam, I got a referral for a bone scan to rule out new tumors. I was extremely relieved after the scan that the radiologist actually gave me the all clear when I expected a wait for the answer. What a relief to know the cancer hadn't moved to the bones.....big sigh.



This month I am schedule for a multitude of appointments, which is nice since the insurance year is ending and I will start with my nice $2500.00 deductible and $7500.00 out of pocket max again in January. I see the occupational therapist for the lymphedema, the physical therapist to help straighten my back out and stop the numb fingers at night, the gynecologist for my annual exam, blah, blah, blah....the list goes on!



I am coming to terms with the lymphedema but still feel like it is a huge pain in the ass and just note fair (yes, I realize life is not fair but I think I've hit my quota for my entire life). My compression sleeve and glove aka torture devices are becoming less noticeable on some days but still not making it through the night with the gigantic oven mitt! The occupational therapist is helping me get this special jacket that will help "decongest" my arm with the aid of a pump.



Off to bake some cookies!
Cheryl
ps-Spell check wasn't working so try to ignore the spelling mistakes.

This is why finding a cure is so important!

While I was going through chemo, Judy emailed me, sent e-cards and called to make sure I was doing well. Although I never met her in person she helped me with a very difficult time in my life. A great woman is gone and I am beyond sad. Cheryl


Judith Lee (Reynolds) Baker

August 2, 1948 - December 3, 2008
Age 60 of Morgan Hill, CA, Judith passed away on December 3, 2008 due to metastatic breast cancer. Judy was born August 2, 1948, in Dayton, Ohio; the second child of Ernest and Dorothy Reynolds, both now deceased.She is survived by her husband and soul-mate, Melvin J. "Mel" Baker, and two great loves of her life; son, Scott, of Apple Valley, Minnesota and daughter, Melinda "Mindy" of Morgan Hill, California, as well as her constant feline companion, "Binxwell J." She is also survived by her brother, John (Mary Frances) Reynolds of Toledo, Ohio; nephew, Jason and niece Katie and their respective families, and by her brother-in-law, George (Debbie) Baker of Huber Heights, Ohio; and nieces, Jacquie and Shannon. Many cherished friends also survive her.

In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made in Judy's memory to the Gabriella Patser Program, Palo Alto, California, which benefits uninsured and underinsured women under the age of 40 who are in need of information/screening for breast issues.

I AM DONE WITH RADIATION

Whoo-hoo! Yippy! I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!!
Thirty four of thirty four treatments completed with very little skin irritation, just slightly red and chapped.

I have an appointment with the medical oncologist 12/10, a follow up with the radiation oncologist in 30 days and several appointments with the occupational therapist over the next month for the lymphedema. It doesn't sound like I am done with treatment but believe me the hard stuff is out of the way.

Follow up sounds like a mammogram every six months, an MRI every other year and possibly blood work (not sure about that part yet). After my 12/10 appointment with Dr Edwards I should have a better idea of the game plan for the next five years.

If I haven't mentioned it before, you are not considered cured until you hit the five year mark. The statistics for my type cancer (stage 2b, grade 2) show about a 76% survival rate and I plan on being in the 76%! I have way too many things I want to accomplish and cancer is not getting in my way.

I better get back to work!
Have a great Thanksgiving.
Cheryl

Tuesday

ONE MORE RADIATION TREATMENT AND I AM DONE!!!! Yippy. Everyone needs to celebrate tomorrow. I am so excited to be finished with the assault on my body and to start the new year on a positive note. What a long, difficult road 2008 has been for us.

I start on Tamoxifen in a few days (blocks the estrogen receptors in the breast tissue). For the next five years I will be taking some kind of estrogen blocker to reduce my risk of the cancer coming back.

The surgeon says I will be considered "cured" in five years if no cancer returns. There is fear lurking in the back of my mind, which I am sure will rear its ugly head each time I go in for a mammogram and/or MRI, blood work, etc. My plan is to see a therapist over the next few months to help me deal with my frustrations, anger and sadness along with the new things that make me happy.

Signing off for today....tons of stuff to do.
Cheryl

Three More to Go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am soooooo excited to finish radiation on Tuesday!!!! Everything is a little red and irritated so it will be nice to get the treatments done. The radiation oncologist gave me a little tube of Aquafor (not sure if that is spelled correctly) to help with irritation over the next week or so.

My energy level is pretty low. I get extremely tired around 2 or 3 in the afternoon, hit my second wind and peter out around 8:30.

Tuesday I plan on posting all of my eyebrow "art"....stay tuned! I've had so much fun thinking of what to write in my eyebrow space. It is actually getting difficult to do the writing since my brows are growing back in. I also have very tiny eyelashes sprouting....they are microscopic. The good news is I should have brows and lashes by the end of the year.

Eddy and I spent the weekend with our friends, Mark and Debbie, at their cabin in Arnold. Until we got there, I didn't realize how much I needed a break from what was going on in our lives. I am sure Eddy needed the change as well since he has been dealing with all the permit issues on the new spray booth himself and trying to make sure we keep the entire company working through the winter. Until you are an owner of a company, you really don't understand the enormous financial responsibility that comes with the job.

Time for bed!
Cheryl

Ten More to GO!!!

I had my 24th radiation treatment this morning along with another x-ray to map the main tumor areas. Next week will start what the radiation oncologist refers to as a "boost". I will receive radiation just to the area that contained the tumors, not the entire breast. The treatment finish line is near....I can see it!

Getting pretty good at drawing on my eyebrows.....I just have to remember not to rub them off during the day! This week I might write Cancer Sucks where my eyebrows should be and see if the radiation techs notice. Won't that be too much fun?

My hair seems to be getting a bit thicker, but I can still see scalp. It seems I am a salt and pepper color. You really can't see it well in the photo because it is so fine and very light.

Look at all of those freckles. Either my hair was hiding freckles or I got more during chemo, not sure which is the case. Recently had a check with the dermatologist and he says nothing to worry about right now in regard to my skin. Thank goodness, I didn't need another issue on my plate.

Time for filing and paying bills.

Cheryl

Eyebrows Gone!

Well, I officially look like a cancer patient today. DAMN IT! DAMN IT! DAMN IT! Eyebrows really make a difference on your face. I have a feeling my upper eyelashes are not going to make it through the weekend (bottoms are all gone).

Maybe not having brows and lashes will motivate me to wear the wig. Oh, this sucks!

I can't think of anything positive to say.....so I am signing off for the evening.
Cheryl

Update

Started to lose my eyelashes and eyebrows a couple of weeks ago. Not sure why my body waited until this point to ditch my eye hair but it is happening! At this point, I only have top lashes and they are very sparse. The eyebrows aren't looking much better. I am drawing in the eyebrows but eyelashes are a little hard to fake.

Good news is my head hair is starting to grow back in. I have about a quarter of an inch of hair, which is a combination of gray and dark brown. No idea what color I will end up with when this is all over. I haven't posted a picture because the hair is fine, light in color and we don't think it will show up in a photo yet.

My wish for Christmas is to have 3/4 to an inch of head hair, a full set of eyelashes, eyebrows and some nose hair (yes, nose hair is important....I am tired of always having a tissue in my pocket). Actually, I would like all of my body hair back....we have it for a reason.

Radiation is going okay. Things are turning pink with what looks like a heat rash. Three times a day I lube up with special lotion, which I hope helps with the burns. Fifteen more sessions of radiation to go and I am done with cancer treatments!!! I am not sure what tests are done after to see if the cancer is all gone but will update you when I see the oncologist on 12/10.

The lymphedema is still a bit of an issue. Wearing my night time sleeve (remember that is the one that looks like the large oven mitt) but not being good about the compression sleeve and glove during the day. My hand is better since I switched my mouse to the left so I've been bad about the compression sleeve.

Well, off to watch the election returns with Eddy!
Cheryl

November is Lung Cancer Awareness Month

The month of November is Lung Cancer Awarenss Month.

For more information visit: http://www.lungcancer.org/reading/about.php

Happy Halloween

Four of my favorite pet costume photos. I received two emails from friends with the photos.....these make me laugh everytime!!!

Hope everyone has a wonderful Halloween!!!

Funny Photo

Our friend, Debbie, sent this photo and it seems to say it all!

Dates not right on posts

Not sure if it is user error or a problem with blogspot, but the dates of my posts are not correct. The 10/22 post is from yesterday.
Cheryl

Radiation: 13 done, 21 to go

The radiation treatments are quick each morning but are starting to take there toll on my energy level (nothing like chemo). My skin is starting to turn a slight pink color. The techs say I should be pretty red by next week.

Nothing else to report on the cancer front other than my lymphedema is getting better. Swelling is down and my index finger is not as sore. I switched to a wireless mouse and I am trying to learn to use it with my left hand to eliminate some of the strain on my right hand. Using your left hand is easier said than done!

Enjoy your weeks!!!
Cheryl

Army of Women

The Army of Women is a national initiative to recruit one million women of every age, ethnicity, and breast cancer history interested in partnering with scientists and taking part in breast cancer research that will move us beyond a cure.

Please take a moment to register www.armyofwomen.org (plus you can read more information on how it all works, check out the FAQ section).

Time to wipe "the beast" aka breast cancer off the face of this earth!

Thank you,
Cheryl

Radiation: Six down, 28 to go!

Just a reminder to do your monthly breast self-exam!

If you haven't done your yearly mammogram...get your butt in there and DO IT! No more excuses.

Radiation: Two Down and 32 more to go

Thought the Chinese breast cancer awareness campaign photo was pretty cool.

Friday was my second radiation treatment, only 32 more to go! My appointment is everyday at 7:15 am, which is mighty early for a medical procedure. I believe patients start arriving at 6:30 am since I am not the first appointment in the day.

Once I complete the radiation, I start on Tamoxifen which is going to help me not get breast cancer again (I will be on this one for five years). Here is a link about Tamoxifen: http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/therapy/tamoxifen.

Eddy and I headed downtown this afternoon to see Burn After Reading. Funny movie but on the dark side in some spots.

I've had a rough couple of weeks in regard to my mental health but feeling like I am coming out of my "funk". The lymphedema thing PISSES me off more than you can imagine. The compression sleeve and glove are like wearing control top pantie hose on your arm.....I HATE IT!!!!! I want to kick, scream, cry and throw myself on the ground.

I am done ranting this evening.
Cheryl

Radiation: One down and 33 more to go

I had my first radiation treatment this morning at 7:15 am. The picture is of a linear accelerator, the machine used for radiation treatments. You are stationary on the table and the machine moves around. My entire breast and underarm area are getting radiated and toward the end of the six and half weeks, I get a little extra in the area of my incisions.

Side effects from the radiation start in around week two or three and will consist of fatigue and skin irritation (redness, swelling, blisters... any number of things can happen). I am still experiencing fatigue and muscle weakness from the chemo so I hope it doesn't get much worse.

There are also long term effects from the radiation. It is my understanding the radiated tissue may feel thicker and be changing over the next two plus years. The lymphedema in my arm could also become worse since they lymph system will get some scar tissue from the radiation. I am not sure how the lymphedema in my rib area will be after treatment.

That is all I have for today. Cheryl

Great Song

Check this out when you have about 4 minutes.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QKxsiRYC9Q
Cheryl

Update on Ducs for a Cure

Eddy just updated the Passionately Pink website with all of our donations.....drum roll please....$8300.00!!! We are still expecting a little over $2000.00 from the Code 4 race team, which should be coming in any day now. You know what that means? We made the goal of $10k!!!

Thank you for the supprt of Susan G Komen for the Cure and our race team, Ducs for a Cure.
Cheryl

Lymphedema Sucks

Can you imagine wearing a really tight sleeve and glove on your right arm daily? How about sleeping in something that looks like one of those police dog training sleeves? Here are a couple of pictures to give you an idea of what I am going to be wearing. The beige sleeve and glove are compression garments and the big blue oven mitt looking thing is to sleep in.

Yesterday was my second appointment with the lymphedema therapist and we went over a lot of information along with getting me custom measured for my new torture devices. I can tell you right now I am probably going to be pretty cranky in the next few weeks since I can not stand having on tight clothing!

Wednesday I go in for my simulation at the radiation oncologist's, which just means they are making sure the "mapping" they did is accurate. October 9th is my first radiation treatment. Total number of radiation treatments is 34......so if all goes as planned the end should be around the beginning of December. The schedule does get pushed out if I am ill, skin needs a break from burning or the radiation machine goes down.

Side effects from the radiation, from what I am told, could be fatigue in about week three, skin issues, swelling and lymphedema (might make it worse). According to the doctor, skin color is no indication of burning from radiation. There is also a slight chance of another cancer in the radiated area but that will take 10-20 years to develop. Something to look forward to in the future (that is sarcasm just in case you weren't sure).

I am due for a tempertantrum....just want to kick and scream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cheryl

Misc "Stuff"

The fundraiser this weekend went very well. Donations at the track $1621.00 and the Susan G Komen site shows a total of $6598.31. Another endurance race team, Code 4 Racing, helped us raise over $2000.00 (they had people donate per lap). The donations from Code 4 should show up in the next week.

Looking for female friends and family to sign up for Army of Women, http://www.armyofwomen.org/aboutus. By signing up you will help in research to figure out what causes breast cancer. Army of Women is looking for women that haven't had breast cancer as well as those that have had cancer. Please take a minute to look at the website and sign up.

Still not feeling 100% but I know it is coming.

Thank you for all of the donations we received for the Susan G Komen for the Cure.
Cheryl

Motorcycle Photos-Check It Out

Eddy and Zip just finished with the graphics on the bike for the endurance race. Photos are in the winner's circle, of course!!!

If you come to the race on Saturday, try to wear pink....yes, men and women!
Thank you,
Cheryl

Update

Unfortunately, I am still not feeling great from my last round of chemo. After each round of chemo I had very uncomfortable abdominal cramping but this time it is really painful. According to the oncologist the cause is from one of the chemo therapies, Taxotere (the T in my TAC treatment). Doctor's recommendation is to take NSAIDs and if that doesn't work go with the narcotics along with a stool softener and laxative. I'll stick with the NSAID (Motrin) but I am adding probiotics because I think my gastrointestinal track is pretty screwed up from the chemo.

My uncle, aunt and cousins came to visit yesterday for lunch. Tony and his wife, Mary, were out visiting from Utah and Kris flew in from San Antonio, Texas. I had grand plans of making lunch for everyone, celebrating birthdays and the end of chemo but had to scale back because I am just too tired. Suzanne, my sister, convinced me ordering good food would be a better idea and she was so right. I loved seeing my family and wish we could have had a longer visit.

Eddy left for the racetrack this morning to finish prepping the bike with the graphics (some kind of big pink ribbon sticker!). I sent him off with very bright pink t-shirts for the team, no mistaking our mission! Friday is practice for Eddy, Simon and Steve so they can all get used to Eddy's bike before the 4 hour endurance race on Saturday afternoon.

Donations are at $4600 plus dollars! Thank you everyone!!!!!

Time for a rest.

Cheryl

The SCAR Project: Surviving Cancer, The Absolute Reality

The link below contains some photos with real breasts, view at your own discretion. I found the pictures very moving but that is due to my close proximity to the situation.
http://www.davidjayphotography.com/TheSCARProject/

Fundraiser Update: We are 37% of our goal! Donations so far $3763.31. Eddy worked on the endurance race bike all weekend while I napped and worked on getting healthy. The body work should return from the painter today, then get graphics when we arrive at the track.

For those of you coming out to the race or already there, try to wear pink to show support for Passionately Pink, Susan G Komen for the Cure.

Thank you!

ER Visit and Hospital Stay

Ended up in the emergency room on Thursday evening with very, very low blood pressure, uncontrollable vomiting and abdominal pain. Needed IV fluids and more anti-nausea medicine but my veins were not cooperating. The pediatric size IV was put in my wrist, which I must say is very painful. The fluids don't move quickly through something so small.....we spent hours in ER before they decided to admit me for "observation". Observation is a code word for waking you up every hour to check you blood pressure and take your temp. During my hospital stay I had several blood tests and ultrasounds (everything looks okay inside, yeah!). I am okay except for the bad reaction to the chemo. Just trying to recover some strength and energy.

I was released on Friday evening and able to sleep a full night in my own bed!!! Eddy's birthday was on Saturday....what a bummer of a birthday for him. We will have to celebrate later with cake and ice cream.

Don't forget about our fundraiser for Susan G Komen. Current donations are at approximately $2700.00 or 27% of our goal. Thank you for the support.
Cheryl

Chemo Graduate

I am finished and received my complete certificated from the oncology staff at the doctor's office! So excited but I know what the next few days will be like. Wish me luck.
Cheryl

Passionately Pink, Susan G Komen for the Cure

Hello!
We are up to $1450.00 in donations for Susan G Komen for the Cure!!! $1300.00 through the website and $150.00 in checks to date. Thank you all so much for taking the time to donate. For those of you that didn't see the post on 9/15 regarding the fundraiser, scroll down a bit and take a look.

My appointment was yesterday with the lymphedema therapist. We went over how your lymph system works and massage stuff to do, which will help with the swelling. I also got to sit in a special jacket that fills up with air to help move the fluid....very cool. For home work I have to work on massaging my lymph system until my next appointment on 10/2. I was sent home with a quilted sleeve to wear while sleeping and a hand mitt you attach with an ace bandage. This morning I woke up with one of the ace bandage clips attached to my head! Nice, made me laugh and is still making me laugh.

Off to my appointment.
Cheryl

Passionately Pink, Susan G Komen for the Cure

As a great majority of you know, Eddy races motorcycles with the American Federation of Motorcyclists or AFM for short, a California road racing club (http://www.afmracing.org/). The club races about once a month from March to October at three different locations, Infineon Raceway (Sonoma), Thunderhill (Willows) and Buttonwillow Race Park (Buttonwillow). Once a year there is a 4 hour endurance race along with the regular race weekend.

For this year's 4-hour endurance race at Infineon Raceway on 9/27, the team members decided to raise $10,000.00 for "Susan G Komen for the Cure". Simon, Steve and Eddy are all committed to helping end breast cancer forever with their donations and donations from family, friends, co-workers, corporate sponsors, friends of friends, etc.

I am deeply touched by the support from Eddy's fellow racers since I was diagnosed in February. There are always hugs and words of encouragement along with the little pink Cheryl stickers the racers run on their bikes. THANK YOU AFM RACERS!!!

For those of you that would like to be part of our fundraising effort, you can do so by going to Eddy's race website, www.finishesunlimited.net/racing and clicking the link to donate directly to our campaign (it links you to the Susan G Komen website). Not comfortable donating online? You can mail a check to us at 121 Via Hermosa, Santa Cruz, CA 95060. Checks should be made out to "Susan G Komen for the Cure".

Thank you for helping us raise money for Susan G Komen for the Cure.
Cheryl

Lymphedema

Well.....more breast cancer fun. I now have a mild case of lymphedema in my right arm. Joy.

I know some of you are wondering "what is lymphedema"....here is your answer. Lymphedema is an accumulation of fluid that can collect in any body part, but most typically in arms or legs. It usually occurs when the lymph vessels or lymph nodes are blocked or removed. The lymphatic system is part of the body's circulatory system and a vital part of the immune system. The lymphatic system runs parallel with the veins and removes cellular waste, bacteria, proteins and excess water from the tissues. The lymphatic system is also the prime vehicle for the immune system, managing foreign bodies and immune cells.
When lymph nodes or pathways are insufficient, damaged or removed through surgery, lymph fluid cannot progress through the body. Thus, the surrounding tissue swells, thickens and becomes painful. Bacteria in this environment can multiply and greatly increase the risk of infection. Fibrosis (excess connective tissue growth) can occur causing stiffness, and limiting movement and range of motion.
With early identification and proper intervention the condition can be treated and controlled, allowing the individual to lead a full and normal life.

I see the occupational therapist on Tuesday and should have a much better idea of how they plan on treating the lymphedema. What I've read says there is a massage technique used along with wrapping the arm, then a compression sleeve and exercises.

Right now my hand and arm do not feel great. I've been elevating my arm morning and night for a couple of days, which seems to help.
Cheryl

Great Day!

I met the greatest group of women today! This morning there was a link on the Susan G Komen message boards regarding a bunch of breast cancer survivors riding from Los Angeles to San Francisco on Harleys. When I looked up the information, would you believe they were going to be in Santa Cruz today? I knew I needed to meet these powerful women. So I headed down to Santa Cruz Harley Davidson to show my support and in the process met amazing, kickass women!

Harley Davidson provides the motorcycles, gives each of the riders a Harley Davidson jacket and every rider raises $1500.00 for breast cancer. Great way to get the word out about breast cancer and have fun doing it. Take a minute to check out the blog http://ahthunderblog.amazonheart.org/.

Stand Up 2 Cancer

ABC, CBS and NBC are all doing a one hour program on September 5th called Stand Up 2 Cancer. The program will have no commercials and is designed to raise funds for the fight against cancer (http://su2c.standup2cancer.org/).

Time: 8 pm et/pt, 7 pm ct
Date: 9/5 (Friday)

Feeling a little better

Feeling a wee bit better today. The bones don't hurt as much, my muscles feel less shaky and I am not as tired. I still need to sit down every few minutes if I move around a lot but that is better than yesterday. I even put makeup on, earrings and polished my head.

Worked on business stuff like invoicing, filing and bills. I know there are estimates to type but I am waiting on Eddy to finish them. Business doesn't stand still just because you have chemo! I am greatful that I can work from home.....I can't imagine trying to head to an office everyday.

Time to put my head down for a bit.
Cheryl

Still Recovering

I am still recovering from the chemo. Not feeling great but pulling through. Had a rough day with the shakes and some chills, hope it is nothing. The bone pain is a bit more intense this time from the Neulasta shot.

Picked my first two tomatoes today from the Ace I planted late in the season. I plan on slicing them up in the next couple of days and eating them au natural. Tomatoes are one of my favorite foods especially home grown. Delicious!!!!

Our apples are finally ready to eat. Eddy is "sharing" apples with the three deer that come by in the evenings. We love watching them try to eat the apples....usually takes between three and six bites. The squirrels also love the apples and steal them at every opportunity.

Not much else going on here. Enjoy the rest of the long weekend.
Cheryl

Round 5 Done!

Very long day. Finished chemo around 3pm this afternoon and I am at home resting. The oncologist gave me a prescription for Effexor to help with the hot flashes....I hope it goes to work very soon.

Just wanted to let you all know I am doing okay today. Going in for the Neulasta shot tomorrow morning.
Cheryl

Almost That Time Again

Hard to believe it is time for another round of chemo. Three weeks just flies by especially since it seems I really only have two weeks of feeling okay.

My sister, Suzanne, is taking me for the chemo appointment tomorrow at 9:30. First we are going to do some walking around to help get my veins plumped up, then some kind of hot pack on my arm to really get those buggers chubby! Possibly even a little light weight lifting on the way to the doctor's office.

I plan on talking to the oncologist about something for the "chemopause" hot flashes, which occur about 2 or 3 times an hour all day and night. My body went from no hot flashes to major boil over in less than a month. I heard Effexor in a very low dose is helping other women with chemically induced menopause.

September 25th is my "simulation" appointment with the radiation oncologist. The techs will do mapping of the area, tattoo me with little spots (these are permanent) and do a practice run without radiation. The official radiation treatments are due to start 1-2 wks after the simulation, which I am guessing to be around 10/6. Treatment is five days a week for seven weeks (you get Saturday and Sunday off to heal a bit). Cross your fingers all of this cancer bleeeep is over in December so I can start off 2009 cancer free!

On a completely different subject, we had a lovely lunch with my aunt and uncle at the Davenport Roadhouse. By and Lillian drove up from Carmel, then took us to lunch. Thank you By and Lillian!!!

Tons of stuff to finish this afternoon so I can stay in bed for a few days!

One more chemo on 9/18 and I am done!!!!!!!!
Cheryl

Race Weekend and other stuff

Eddy and I took off very early Friday morning for a weekend of racing at Infineon Raceway (formerly Sears Point) with the AFM. The weather cooperated with sunny skies, I felt well enough to go and Eddy was ready to get on the track again. I loved seeing everyone this weekend since I missed the races at the beginning of July. Thank you everyone at the AFM races for all of the encouragement and support....much appreciated!

Sorry for taking so long for a new post, I just haven't had anything much to say. I am tired from the chemo and lack of sleep due to the hot flashes. The lack of REM sleep is really catching up with me. I am having memory issues which could either be from chemo or lack of sleep or possibly both.

My next round of chemo is scheduled 8/28. If I made a comment regarding chemo it would contain an enormous amount of swear words, which I am sure most of you don't want to hear. Chemo is not getting over fast enough for me.

Time for me to get back to work!
Cheryl

Rough Round

After round three, I have issues with one of the veins in my left arm. The nurses are not be able to use the vein because of the damage and now I am very limited on IV sites.

Getting the IV in for round four of chemo took sticking my elbow in hot water, a warming pack and three needle sticks but finally we got a good vein. I am going to try using a hot pad next time, walk around the block several times to get my blood moving and use one of my dumbbells in the effort to "plump" up my veins. The alternative to the IV is having a port put in near my collarbone, but I would rather avoid more surgery and scars.

I can say this round of chemo is much harder on me than the others and I am not bouncing back as quickly. The side effects of chemo don't usually rear their ugly heads until late Friday or early Saturday but this time I felt unwell by Friday morning. I am starting to feel a bit better this evening. Note: To tell if you are starting to feel better, watch a cooking program on TV and if it doesn't make you feel like vomiting, you are on the road to recovery!

One of the side effects I started experiencing because of chemo....HOT FLASHES! I can say that doing chemo and having hot flashes is high on the list of sucky things in life. One of the reasons this round of chemo is more difficult could have to do with the lack of REM sleep. Eddy set up a fan right next to my side of the bed which I turn on when I start to "boil" over. Bet you could fry an egg on my head!

Our wonderful neighbors, Bonnie and Jeff, brought us dinner again! Roast pork, polenta and broccoli (I love polenta). It really takes a load off Eddy when he doesn't have to make dinner especially since he has already done it all weekend. Thank you so much Bonnie and Jeff.

Margie, neighbor below us, is keeping me in roses throughout treatment. I came home from chemo on Thursday to find a lovely arrangement on the door step (and they smell good because they come from her garden). Flowers really do make you smile.

Just about time for some dinner, the Olympics and more rest.
Thank you so much for all your well wishes and support!
Cheryl

Off to Round 4

Off to round 4 of my treatment. My sister, Suzanne, is doing the pick up and drop off today along with getting me in for my Neulasta shot tomorrow.

The appointment today is set for 8:40, which means I really don't start until about 9:30 after getting a little blood work, meeting with the oncologist and having my chemo "cocktail" mixed. Treatment usually lasts around 4 hours. I hope to be home around 1 or 2 this afternoon.

I'll post again when I can or maybe Eddy will do it on the days I feel crappy.
Cheryl

Oregon Trip Pictures

We hiked down the cliff and across this natural bridge to take a few pictures of the beautiful coast line.

This natural bridge is located at Indian Sands, one of the many places to stop along the Oregon coast.

Eddy on the other side of the natural bridge.

Isn't Oregon gorgeous? We didn't run into anyone else while out hiking. I just love being alone in the outdoors.

Good thing Eddy has such long arms! I am standing on a rock to make it a better photo.

Mini Vacation to Brookings Oregon

Eddy and I took a mini vacation to my mom's beach house in Brookings, Oregon. On Thursday we left around 9 am, ran a few errands then headed out on 101 to Brookings.

We had such a good time hiking, walking on the beach and just relaxing....it was wonderful. I am going to try posting pictures.

Cute Puppies

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJ0IZ4R6-Ok

Cute video of puppies.

Today's Ramblings

Had a wee bit of a set back last Thursday and Friday with a slight temp and a whole lot of body aches. My white blood cell count had probably dipped and the body aches were most likely from one of the chemos I receive. Started to feel better over the weekend.

I've been busy working with Eddy, doing payroll and trying to keep up with bills. It seems like I need to get as much done as possible while I feel well.

Chemo schedule is 8/7, 8/28 and 9/18. I know it has been said before, but I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL THIS IS OVER!!!

That is all for the evening....I am very tired tonight.
Cheryl

Coming 'round the mountain!

Round 3 wasn't much worse than round 2, thank goodness! I did have a bit of an issue with my vein after I received the infusion on Thursday. Most of the pain is gone and now there is only bruising. The oncology nurse said the vein is irritated. I hope for the next round the nurse can use another spot on my arm or hand. Cross your fingers.

On Friday I had my Neulasta shot and by Friday evening it was "game on". The shot sure makes you ache inside the bones, but Tylenol seems to take the edge off the pain (the big bones hurt like your sternum, thigh bones, pelvis and back). I slept most of Saturday, which I am sure if very good for me. By mid Sunday I was starting to feel more alert, watched the MotoGP race with Eddy and managed to eat the wonderful pasta dinner our neighbors, Bonnie and Jeff, brought over. You can not know how much we appreciate the meals! Thank you.

Three cheers for Eddy! Cooked, cleaned and took care of me like a champ this weekend. I know if Eddy wasn't putting food in front of me, I would not be eating. When nothing sounds good, it is extremely difficult to make yourself something to eat. I count my lucky stars for Eddy everyday!

I was very disappointed that we missed going to MotoGP at Laguna Seca this year because of chemo. We have seats in the Turn 3 Suites and love to be at the races for all of the action. It just wasn't the same watching it on the television.

Time to do a little bit of paperwork, some lunch with my friend Lauren and probably a nap on the deck.
Cheryl

Round 3 Done

I am half way to the end!!!! Yippy!!!! Only three more rounds of chemo to go. Feeling like I have medicine head this everning so off I go to watch some t.v. with Eddy.

Tomorrow I get the Neulasta shot which will knock me down for a few days. I hope to feel better by Sunday or Monday.

I will post more later.
Cheryl

Sunday is for relaxing!

Eddy is in the living room watching MotoGP (for those of you who don't know, international motorcycle racing.....very exciting stuff) and I am sitting in bed with a cup of coffee and the laptop. Lefty, our cat, is sleeping in Eddy's gym bag. Everyone is enjoying Sunday morning! I know by next weekend I will not even want a coffee so I am savoring the one right now.

We picked up Eddy's motorcycle from the shop yesterday and headed to the mall to spend my birthday present from Grandpa Toci. Retail therapy is wonderful! I now have two shirts, one salmon pink and the other turquioise, along with a pair of sandals to match the second shirt. The shirts look fabulous with the opal earrings Eddy gave me for my birthday. I have to say, Eddy is one of the best shoppers! He always gets me great presents and I know Eddy puts a lot of thought into them.

On my birthday we had dinner with our friends Lionel, Jen and Amara at Caffe Lucio. Food was delicious but the best part of the evening was watching Amara eat capellini! Amara does a great job with a fork and even tried to twirl her noodles after seeing her mother do it. What an amazing little girl!

Make sure to enjoy the day!
Cheryl

Hanging in there

I am feeling better each and everyday. The thoughts, good vibes and prayers must be working. White blood cell count was good along with the platelets and red blood cells (means the Neulasta shot that makes me hurt all over is doing its job).

My next round of chemo is on 7/17, which means I will be half way done!!! Yippy!!! I do dread the upcoming treatment and days following but know there is an end in sight. Once the chemo is finished in mid-September, I am doing seven weeks of radiation and hope to be done by the end of December (just in time for our 5th wedding anniversary). Everyone cross your fingers I can pack all treatments into 2008 since I've already met my $2500 deductible and $7500 out of pocket maximum.

Today is my 43rd birthday! Suzanne, my sister, is taking me to lunch for a little celebration. I want to try a new restaurant that opened on Pacific Ave called Khyber Pass (Pakistani food). Eddy and I will probably go out for dinner this evening, not sure where.

Time for me to get back to work! Enjoy the weekend.
Cheryl

Chemo Sucks.....

......but naps are good. I can't seem to make it through the day without one or two "time-outs" on the bed. Falling asleep never felt so good....why do children fight it?

This round of chemo made me very, very tired. I did spend the weekend asleep most of the time or staring off into space. Eddy set up a couch outside on the deck for me so I could enjoy the outdoors while resting. I love being able to watch the birds flying overhead and the wind in the trees.

I've decided not to wear the wig, hats or scarves. Bald is fine with me and Eddy doesn't seem to mind. People aren't looking at me (well, at least when I am looking) and there haven't been any funny comments, so I will continue going "topless".

Time for bed.
Cheryl

Just coming around

I am coming out of the chemo "coma" this morning. Spent the weekend sleeping and feeling like hell. Will post more later when I have energy.
Cheryl

Chemo Today

I am off to my second round of chemo in ten minutes, which means I should be home around 11-12. Last time I didn't feel bad on Thursday but start to feel "unwell" by Friday and by Tuesday "unwell" moved its way to "feeling like hell". I am going to have an easier time this go around...that is what I am repeating to myself....feel free to join me!

Margie, our friend and neighbor, is fattening me up! We received the most delicious berry dessert the other day. Thank you, Margie!!!! Berry cobblers, crumbles, etc are Eddy's sweet treat of choice and he was very happy.

Hope you all have a good day.
Cheryl

Bald is Beautiful

Shaved Head

Well, hair was not cooperating today. I just had Eddy buzz it off, then shave my head in the shower. The bald head is not bad, makes your eyes stand out more and shows off a nice pair of earrings. I

am seriously considering going out "topless" some of the time so don't be surprised if you see me sporting my bald do....just have to get the guts up to go out of the house this way!!

I'll see if Eddy will take my photo and post it later.
Cheryl

More Hair News

Still have my hair but it is falling out! I am guessing we are going to do the head shave either Tuesday or Wednesday depending on the rate of fall out. Right now, if I just don't mess with the hair it seems to stay in place, just shedding a bit more than usual. When you pull on the hair it comes out in clumps. I am trying to remember not to touch my head much and not toss and turn at night since that seems to "rub" more hair off. By the way, losing your hair is not pain free. Those of you that have worn a tight ponytail all day and then taken it down know about that weird feeling that your hair "hurts".

My white blood cell count was 1.2 last week (I believe the normal range is 4.0 to 10.0), now it is 13.2! The raised WBC explains why I feel so much better. The Neulasta shot I get on the day after chemo is responsible for the WBC increase.

My mom and Ron are staying at our house until Sunday morning, then they are heading to down south to visit Ron's daughter, son-in-law and grandkids in Newport Beach. Eddy's mom is arriving Sunday morning from Santa Rosa and will go home on Monday. It is nice to have visitors when I feel well.

Our new deck in the backyard is finished and I was finally able to sit outside in a lounge chair and drink my glass of wine! Oh, what a thrill!!!! I've been waiting six or so years to enjoy the backyard and that time has arrived, yeah!

For those of you hearing about the Trabing Fire near Watsonville.....it is not close to us or Ron's son and daughter-in-law (closer to them but going the opposite direction, I think).

Eddy signed a five year lease on new shop space for us in the City of Campbell. We are moving with our decorative paint partner, Buena Vista Faux and Mural, in mid-July. The shop is about 2800 square feel with a spray booth already in the space. There is an area for the show room and offices. Eddy, who is great at seeing the potential in a space, already has plans for expanding the show room, creating more office space, etc. We are very excited about the move!

Signing off for the day. Cheryl

Hair

Oh, my hair is starting to fall out. Damn it! I bet by this weekend I will be bald....I might just shave it on Friday because I think this is going to be messy. Maybe we will post pictures of my new look in wigs this weekend. Stay tuned.

My legs better lose hair too or I am going to be really mad! Could you imagine being bald on your head but still having to shave your legs....that wouldn't be very fair.

A Message by George Carlin

A message by George Carlin:

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees, but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are the days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...

Remember, spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever.

Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Remember to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

Remember to say "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all...mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.

Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person will not be there again.

Give time to love, give time to speak. And give time to share the precious thoughts n your mind.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

George Carlin

Shot of new hair do

Eddy finally got a picture of the new do! I haven't been fussing with my hair much since I'd like it to last as long as possible. My hope is not using the hair dryer and pulling on it will help it stay in place a day or two longer. I think the haircut makes me look a lot more like my mother, Linda.

My dreams last night were of wet, mangy looking cats and kittens that smelled like roses! Not sure why the cat dreams, but I know why I smelled roses. I have a vase of home grown roses that smell absolutely delicious right next to the bed (thank you Margie for the flowers!!!)

Eddy and I are going to snuggle up on the couches this evening to watch two movies loaned to us by Jeff and Bonnie (neighbors above us), Juno and Thank You for Smoking.

Have a good weekend!
Cheryl

Video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W_yivlcCpB4&feature=related

This video clip was posted on the Susan G Komen site. The first minute or so really hit home for me.

Spoke Too Soon

Oh, my goodness! Had a bit of a set back this week. Was not feeling well, got a little temp (100.1), a lot of pain from the Neulasta shot and I started throwing up. I had to go in yesterday for re-hydration IV with anti-nausea medicine, which helped perk me up. My white blood cell count was tested and is already very low (I think day 10 is when it is supposed drop, so this is a bit sooner). Since WBC is low, I am on antibiotics for the next week to keep infections at bay.

Next round of chemo is set for 6/26. Hopefully, with the "tweaks" made to my regimen, I will have an easier time.

Getting Better

Wow! Chemotherapy is some powerful medicine. I am drinking water to help clear the chemo out of my system and trying to eat several small meals a day. It feels like I get spurts of energy then it is time for another nap.

I have to send a huge THANK YOU to Lauren Feniello for the wonderful "chemo" cut and the restyle on the wigs! Lauren went with me to pick out wigs, took me back to the salon to get the wigs right for me, then gave me my new short Sharon Stone look (kind of a combination of Tinkerbell meets Peter Pan). Lauren did not charge me for all of her time and effort (wouldn't even take a big tip....this is a good tip for hairdressers....don't run with scissors!). You really learn who cares about you when going through something like cancer! Lauren, THANK YOU. I still need Eddy to post a picture of the new haircut before I am bald, look for that in the next day or two. Lauren works at Main Street Annex (formerly Tangles Salon) in Los Gatos, 408-218-5235 (cell). The salon is under new ownership and completely remodeled inside....I love it!

Time to sign off for today.
Cheryl

Quick Update

Not feeling 100%, not much of an appetite and a little achy all over. Taking it easy, sleeping and watching TV (there is not much on).

Thank you for all the good thoughts!
Cheryl

Chemo

Made it through my first round of chemo today. Very long, long day for the two of us. My chemo was set to start at 10:45 but we didn't really get going until around noon. There was a back up of patients and only one oncology nurse today. Next go around should be better. I am tired from all of the drugs other than the chemo you get (Benydrl and more steroids along with anti-nausea in the IV).

Tomorrow I go in for the Neulasta shot, which will make me fatigued but helps fight infection. The doctor said I should start feeling the effects of chemo starting tomorrow.

Signing off for the evening.

Chemo Cut

I love my new chemo cut! Once Eddy takes a couple of pictures, I can post them. I also got a nice wig and one of those half-head wig things that go under hats. The store also had sleeping hats because when you have no hair your head tends to get cold (I was told by several people, not just the sales person).
Cheryl

Good Day

We had our front yard cleared of weeds, ivy and jasmine today! Yard is down to dirt except for the front lawn, which is getting torn up for new sod. The back got attacked by the weed eater and looks much better. This evening I was able to see a fawn bouncing around in the field behind our house since there were no more weeds blocking my view. Cute as a button!

My sister, Suzanne, took me shopping in San Jose today at Valley Fair. It was nice to get away for the day, find a couple of things and have lunch. I wish it could have been a longer day but I still get tired in the afternoons and I just wasn't super interested in anything. For those of you that know about DSW (the shoe store), I couldn't find anything I wanted, which is saying a lot since there are sooooo many shoes to choose from in there. It was obviously not my shopping day.

Tomorrow is new hair cut day! I am very excited and wished I had done it a few weeks ago when I had my hair colored. Cat is out of the bag, I color my hair! I started getting grays around thirtysomething, so I've been coloring since then. Now my eyebrows, lashes, etc are getting gray. In fact, I found a couple of gray arm hairs the other day!

We are also wig shopping tomorrow. Not sure how I feel about the wig thing, mixed emotions. I feel too young for a wig and like everyone will know I have it on. We'll see how the morning goes and if I actually get one. By the way, Eddy is going for the wig shopping trip. Could you ask for a better best friend in life?

I talked to three cancer survivors today. Judy B who I met on the Susan G Komen message boards, Beverly who I met at the hairdresser getting her wig trimmed a few weeks ago (doing chemo right now) and the clerk I met at Nordstrom today who is a stage IV survivor (five years). It means so much for me to talk with women who are going through the same or have gone through the same experiences I am. It is hard to understand if you have not been diagnosed with cancer, you might have an idea but you really don't feel the full impact of what it means to have cancer and all that goes with it. I will never be the same person that I was before diagnosis and I know I will continue to change through this life altering journey I am on. It will be interesting to see who I am on the other side.

Please keep up the positive thoughts for me....I need them for the upcoming days.
Cheryl

Details about Chemotherapy

I thought it might be a good idea to give you all a little more detail on the upcoming treatments. My treatment plan is T A C, which is Taxotere, Adriamycin and Cytoxan, once every three weeks with a Neulasta shot the day after. I am doing six rounds of TAC over the next 4 1/2-5 months if my white blood counts do not drop too low. I love the verbiage on the drug sheet handouts, "may make you feel generally unwell". This is the nice way to say you are going to feel like crap.

T=Taxotere. Nasty side effects, too many to list, but complete hair loss on your entire body is mentioned and the other is changes in nail color (I am hoping for a pink sparkle but I bet that is not what they mean). This one may cause an allergic reaction so I am also on Decadron, which is a steroid to help decrease this issue.

A=Adriamycin. More of the same nasty side effects, along with a few others. My finger nails may never be the same again. This one causes your urine to turn very red, nickname is "Red Devil"....nice. I had a heart ultrasound done before treatment because this one can cause heart damage. Care giver should not come in contact with patient's body fluids for five days after treatment....what in the world?! Is kissing okay?

C=Cytoxan. I love this one. On the "Drugs that may interact with Cytoxan" cocaine is listed along with products that contain St John's wort (there are also others but I found those two funny). Isn't cocaine cheaper than gasoline now?

Neulasta. The header on the drug sheet says "for patients on strong chemotherapy". Neulasta is a white blood cell booster and will help protect me against chemotherapy-related infection. The most common side effect is mild to moderate bone pain. No where on the drug sheet does it say "may make you feel generally unwell" but I bet that is what they mean.

All three drugs decrease the body's ability to fight infection with Neulasta trying to help fight infection. It is going to be the cold and flu season for me starting in June. I need to avoid crowds for the next few months. Rules of engagement for visits, if you feel like you are coming down with something or one of your family members is ill, please don't come over. Your little cold or flu can make me very ill.

Another issue beyond infections are food borne illnesses. All fruits and vegetables need to be well washed. If you can't scrub the surface, don't eat it (no berries). Melons, pears, apples, etc need to scrubbed prior to eating. Lots of hand washing and washing of food prep surfaces. Meats thawed in the refrigerator and cooked thoroughly. No raw shellfish or sushi.

Another side effect from the chemotherapy treatment is menopause. After I am through with treatment, we will have to see if I am still pre-menopausal or if the chemo put me into permanent menopause. I will feel "generally unwell" from the chemo with hot flashes and the rest of the menopause side effects too.

The oncologist says I will start to feel the chemo on the day after or possibly the second day and will most likely be in bed for a few days. Treatments are cumulative so the more I have the longer it is going to take to recover.

I hope that wasn't too much information for everyone.
Cheryl

Komen 3 Day Walk San Francisco & other stuff

Hi everyone,
Donna from Valley Oak Vet in Scotts Valley is doing the Susan G Komen 3 day walk for breast cancer in San Francisco at the beginning of September (60 miles!!!). You can connect to her blog http://www.sanfrancisco3daywalker.blogspot.com/ for more details and how to donate, if you are interested. There is a link on Donna's blog to the Susan G Komen website, which has a great deal of information about the walks, what Susan G Komen is all about, etc. I visit the Susan G Komen message boards daily to get information from other breast cancer survivors, great stuff from people who are going through what you are going through (all across the United States).

Tuesday I am going wig shopping with Eddy and my hairdresser/friend, Lauren (Main St Annex in Los Gatos....great salon, just remodeled) and getting my "chemo" cut. Going for the short do Sharon Stone sports, I think www.short-hairstyles.com/short/s191.htm. I want to have a no fuss hair style for the next couple of weeks until my hair comes out all the way, less to mess with, less to lose....I am taking control! Not sure how I am going to feel about being bald, but I can tell you right now I am very excited to get my hair cut short!

That is all for today.
Cheryl

Photos

Good evening!
If you click this link.... http://www.bayarearidersforum.com/forums/showthread.php?t=246109 it takes you to BARF (Bay Area Riders Forum). You can view photos of the race bikes with the sticker.
Cheryl

Race Weekend A Success!

Good morning,
The race weekend went well except for the rain that interrupted practice on Saturday. Eddy finished 6th in Open Twins on Sunday, which is his favorite race. I can't remember the outcome of the other two races since Open Twins was so exciting. GO EDDY!!!

We celebrated two birthdays at the track, Zip's and Dave's. There was cake, cake and more cake! Yummy. We did have hamburgers and hot dogs, but I was much more interested in having cake, with my favorite being the rum cake. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZIP AND DAVE!

For the motorcycle racers reading my blog, THANK YOU FOR RUNNING THE PINK RIBBON CHERYL STICKERS ON YOUR BIKES! I can't thank everyone enough for the support, it means so much to me knowing I have a "team" of people behind me. Even though all of you have your own individual race teams, I am looking at it as "Team Pink" and it is inspiring.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Memorial Day.
Cheryl

*&^%#%)*^ poop

This is going to be short....starting chemotherapy on June 5th. I'll be on a chemo cocktail of three lovely drugs with some crazy side effects, hair loss being one of them. The chemotherapy schedule is once every three weeks for about the next 4 and 1/2 months, then radiation starts a couple of weeks after. My goal is to have my last treatment by the end of the year, which is pushing it.

I usually make my posts filtering my emotions because I don't want to scare my family and friends.....you may not see this in upcoming posts. I am very, very upset and having a hard time dealing with what is happening to me and to us. Yes, a positive attitude is great, but right now I am not there or anywhere close.

Update & a bunch of other "stuff"

The pathology test from the surgery changed the stage of the cancer from Stage I to Stage II. The stage is based on the size of the tumors and lymph node involvement. I was okay with the information at the doctor's office but as the evening went on I spiraled downward until I had a sob fest yesterday afternoon. Doing okay today.

Green light for exercising since it has been a full two weeks since surgery. The doctor also gave me some exercises to do with my arm for mobility and if those don't work, I can get a referral to a physical therapist.

I'd like to thank those of you that did go out and donate blood. THANK YOU. It is so important we have a good supply of blood, you never know when you might be in need of a transfusion. Donating blood is so easy, it is free, you get cookies and jucie when finished and you can do it every 56 days (you do have to weigh at least 115 pounds to donate)!

I LOVE EDDY GONZALES! I realized how much Eddy loves me when I was recovering. Eddy made me a poncho (more like a bolero jacket) out of plastic garbage bag and masking tape so I could shower while I still had the drain in. He washed my hair, soaped me up, dried me off and dressed me. Eddy emptied my drain every few hours, measured the contents and recorded the amounts (made me woozy when we did this). Multiple trips up and down the stairs to make sure I had what I needed and he never complained. I am so thankful to have Eddy in my life, now and forever.

Have a great day!

Monday Morning Ramblings

Good Morning Cancer Support Team!
Eddy and I had a busy weekend. Friday afternoon friends dropped off dinner and dessert, which was absolutely delicious!!! Our neighbors came by to the check the possible sprinkler system leak near our property line and we did some visiting, then our friends came by with their daughter for a little more visiting. I had a glass of wine, finally! On Saturday morning Eddy and I headed over the hill to San Jose for a few hours, then back to Santa Cruz for bra shopping. I have to say Eddy is one of the best shoppers, he will help pick sizes/styles and even hold my purse without complaining (people would be stupid to give him a hard time about a purse, he is big and he can do this really scary thing with his eyes when he is mad). Three cheers for Eddy!!! I was able to do Mother's Day with my mom this year since they haven't returned to Oregon yet. Mom's daughter-in-law, Dana, put together a wonderful Sunday brunch for all of us.

Tomorrow is my post-op appointment with Dr Rose. I am hoping to get a physical therapy "prescription" from the doctor since I want full use of my right arm sooner rather than later (can only lift it to shoulder level and I REALLY want to shave my underarm!). It would also be nice to get the green light to begin exercising again.

The next appointment is on 5/20 with the medical oncologist, Dr Andrea Edwards, who is kind of the treatment "coordinator". We will go over all of my options for treatment, chemotherapy, radiation, hormone therapy, etc. The surgeon, Dr Rose, felt I would need chemotherapy due to the two tumors on the right and the positive lymph node, but we will wait to see what Dr Edwards says. I do know that radiation is part of the treatment since that is the "standard of care" for patients that have a lumpectomy.

I will keep everyone abreast (thought that was kind of funny!) on the outcome of all the appointments.
Cheryl

Good News Today!

Dr Rose just called......we have clear margins on the tumors and only one lymph node positive for cancer!!!!! Yippy! The less nodes the better in regard to chemotherapy (maybe I won't need to do it, wouldn't that just be FANTASTIC!!!!!!).

I just took off the compression bra, what a relief, I can actually take a deep breath. To keep everything in place, I will wear it at night only. Dr Rose also said to get my mobility back, I could start lifting my arm up until it hurts.

Dr Rose contacts the oncologist and radiologist about my case, then they call me to arrange appointments. I want to get the ball rolling so I can get treatments over with this year. I want 2009 to be cancer free.

On a side note, Lefty (our cat) decided to drink water out of a very full water glass next to the bed last night. Well, he ended up dumping it over on me in the middle of the night, soaking the mattress, my compression bra and part of the comforter. Bad kitty. No more glasses of water next to the bed at night, I can't move fast enough not to get wet!

I want to thank all of you for the emails, phone calls, prayers, good vibes, whatever you've been sending out....THANK YOU!

Guilty!

Guy took the DA up on their offer of 4 years in prison so we did not have to testify today....yeah! DA says he really will do two years (he already has almost seven months of that under his belt since he was arrested). What a huge relief. I was not looking forward to the whole court room thing and more waiting.

Suzanne did a wonderful job on my hair today and I even put on a little makeup. Eddy and I are going to the pet store for a very short outing, my first since getting home on Thursday.

Drain under my arm was removed today....yeah! Another piece of good news. I wish I'd been warned that it would hurt so I could have taken a pain pill before hand. Takes about 45 minutes and it is starting to kick in now....weeeeee!

Tired but stilling hanging in there!

It is amazing how a little three hour drug induced nap at the hospital and some cutting can make you so tired! Whew. When people said to take it easy, I can certainly see why now.

Woke up from surgery and saw the clock said 6:00 pm and I knew things had not gone well with the lymph nodes. Surgery was supposed to only be about two hours, but was told if we had to take out stage 1 and 2 nodes it would be around three hours. My under arm and arm did not "feel" right when I woke up and I think that is the first thing I let them know was wrong. I also woke up crying, which the nursing staff said is a normal reaction when you come out. I wanted Eddy to be with me right away and it seems like he was there pretty fast but you know when on drugs things are not always what they seem!

I was so glad to come home on Thursday....I did not want to stay in the hospital. Eddy and Lionel moved our mattress upstairs so I would not be pestered by the cats and I could watch tv when I wanted. Mom and Suzanne remade the beds and I climbed on in but did not sleep well with the very, very tight compression bra on. The bra makes taking a full breath difficult and the first night I felt I stopped breathing a lot....I am sure this was my drugged mind playing tricks on me. I also have this plastic tube coming out my side with a big plastic ball on the end, which makes sleeping or moving kind of an issue (I hope the drain comes out today!).

Visiting Nurses should be here today for a look at my incisions and vital signs. The drain should come out if all is well! Not sure how long I have to wear the bra since I do not have an actual bandage on the lumpectomy site, just glue (allergic to surgical tapes).

Signing off for today!

Recovering

Feeling okay today. A bit sore, tired and very disappointed with the removal of the lymph nodes. Not looking forward to chemo.

Thank you for all of your support, emails, voicemails, good vibes and prayers....very much appreciated.
Cheryl

Cheryl is home from surgery

Today's surgery went well from a technical stand point, but we are not thrilled with what had to happen. The lymph node system tested positive for cancer and a full lymphepctimy was neccesary. What does that mean? That means a longer recovery time from the surgery and a combination of chemotherapy and radiation therapy. There will also be a drainage tube and bottle to collect fluid from the lymphepctimy site for a few days.

Cheryl was a trooper today, all day, and it was a long day. She repeatedly said "I just wanna go home" and I just wanted to get her home. Thank you Linda and Suzanne for being there for us at the hospital, we love you and couldn't have done it without you.

Lots of people have been calling and leaving messages and we love you for it, we'll get back with you when the pain meds wear off a little.

Eddy

Nervous Energy

My mom took me to lunch today and then we did a little shopping at the mall. I needed a couple of tops that button up the front and sweat pants. Eddy and I worked on getting our business stuff buttoned up so I won't have to do anything until Sunday. We also met with the DA regarding the break in from October. Probably won't testify on Monday but it could be Tuesday or Thursday or not at all (we will know more on Friday).

I am signing off for the evening so I can get a lot of sleep (with help from my little friend Ambien!). Eddy will post on the blog when we get home in the late evening.

Thank you all for your warm wishes and support!

Race Weekend & Surgery Info

Eddy did well at Infineon Raceway this weekend. The race report should be up on www.finishesunlimited.net/racing sometime in the next few days for you to read, if interested. I believe this time there will be a video from the camera Eddy had on the bike (he is trying to figure out how to get it on to his computer).

We met with the surgery coordinator on Friday and I am set to have a VERY BUSY day on Thursday! I am able to have a little breakfast in the morning, but nothing after 6:00 am including water. At 10:00 am I head to the Dominican Breast Center to get wires inserted in the tumors. From the DBC, we head over to the Nuclear Medicine department at Santa Cruz Medical for the poison dye....I mean radioactive dye injections at 11:00 am. I need to be at the Sutter Surgery by 1:30 for the the pre-op stuff. Surgery is scheduled for 3:00 pm and is around two hours. Not really sure what time Eddy and I get to head home on Thursday, but my guess would be around 6:30 or 7:00 pm.

That is all I have for now!

Surgery Date Set

Finally, surgery is scheduled! Going in on May 1st and it will be a long day. First order of business is getting the wires placed in both tumors on the right breast at Dominican Breast Center. Then I am off to Santa Cruz Medical to get injected with radioactive dye in my breast. Doesn't that sound pleasant? Once I am radioactive, we head off to the Sutter Surgery Center for the big "show". The doctor starts with the sentinel nodes (which are near your underarm). A Geiger counter is used to locate the sentinel nodes, they are removed and sent off to the lab for analysis. While we are waiting for the pathology test on the sentinel nodes, the doctor will perform the lumpectomy (they actually call it a partial mastectomy, lumpectomy sounds much better to me). Dr Rose will remove the rest of the nodes IF the sentinel nodes come back positive for cancer (we are not voting for that procedure). Everyone think in your mind "NO NODES, NO NODES, NO NODES" and click your heels together. According to the doctor, I'll spend one hour in recovery and then get to go home for recuperation. Dr Rose said I should start to feel more normal on Monday, but I am supposed to take it easy for a couple of weeks (not sure how long the recovery time is if all of the nodes come out).

My mom, Linda, is coming from Oregon to help us for a few days with meals and whatnot while I am recovering from the surgery. Suzanne will also be here for support, doctor rides, etc. "Steady Eddy" will do his usual and keep me sane!

Well, off I go....dinner plans with Eddy's family.

Doctor's Appt

Good Morning Cancer Support Team!

Our doctor's appointment is now on Wednesday at 1:45 p.m. so Eddy can be there with me! Yeah!!! The doctor's assistant, Lesli, says there is a great deal of information to go over.

Wow, scary.....surgery is coming up soon! Kind of like waiting for "Bad Christmas" because you aren't getting what you wanted.

I have the most colorful bruise from the MRI guided biopsy! We have deep purple, red, blue and a very sickening shade of yellow. Looks like I was hit with a baseball bat, no wonder the biopsy hurt! Radiologist said it might take a few weeks for it to disappear.

Well, I need to get myself back to work on balancing the checking accounts....joy!

Genetic Test is Negative!!!!

The doctor just called, BRCA1 and BRCA2 test came back negative. No gene mutation for me, thank you very much!!!! Also good news for my family.

I have an appointment on Tuesday at 1:45pm to discuss surgery with Dr Rose....appointment might get changed so Eddy can be there with me, but I won't know until Monday about a new date.

I am thrilled....weekend should be great! Thank you everyone for the good energy....it worked wonders.

No Cancer on the Left!!!!!!!

I am sooo haaaaappppy right now! No cancer in the left breast, yipppppyy!!!!!!!! The genetic test is completed and on its way via Fed X to the doctor's office. Lesli is trying to get a faxed copy of the results so Dr Rose can go over it. I am assuming the test will be negative since no family members have had breast cancer.

Just one more little hurdle to cross with the genetic test results, then I can schedule surgery, do my radiation treatments and move on with my life!

Thank you for all the good vibes, positive thoughts and prayers....they must have worked!!!!!!